20 July2003 Resta While Mark6:30-34
Astrange thing happened about three days into Vacation Bible School. Iwas the teacher of the children going into Kindergarten and FirstGrade and I was becoming one of them. And I realized that it didn'tmatter so much how much information I managed to impart to them butrather that what was imparted to them was what all thatinformation meant whether they ever got the exact information itselfor not. Now being a Vacation Bible School teacher takes enormousamounts of energy. I mean you have to be there every minute.You have to pay attention and it is real work but what I found when Ibecame one of them was this incredible restfulness within me whichassured me that I didn't need to worry about this anymore or fretabout doing it right or even doing it on a schedule. All I had to dowas enjoy it. Enjoy my new friends who were mostly five years old.All I had to do was start the conversation and listen and go where ittook us. Sometimes I didn't even have to start the conversation. Ithas been a while since I had a real conversation with afive-year-old. They know more than I thought they did. But they seethe world differently than I do. It turned out that this is a greatage group for me because I didn't have to make sense and somehow thatmade sense. Some of the kids in my class were not real comfortablewith printed words yet. And this was good for me. I realized that Itend to depend on words to get me by (It's nothing for me to come upwith 2000 words to say one thing.) but now we had to find other waysto learn and to see the world and to see God. Story-telling andcrayons and playdough can open whole new ways of seeing. And thosebeautiful children gave me rest and filled my heart with light again.You would think that teaching Bible School would be anything butrestful but in my case at least, though I had not heard it before Ibegan, the voice of Jesus kept saying in the children themselves comeand rest a while, come and rest a while. My body is tired but my soulis rested and refreshed and renewed. Bodies need rest too of courseand Jesus recognized this in his weary disciples but you willprobably find that the body will get little rest if the mind andspirit cannot rest as well. Resting in God is more than just notdoing anything for a while, it is abiding in the peace that passesunderstanding, a gift beyond words.
ThomasKelly, writing more than half a century ago wrote: The problem weface today needs very little time for its statement. Our lives in amodern city grow too complex and overcrowded. . . . . before we knowit we are bowed down with burdens, crushed under committees,strained, breathless, and hurried, panting through a never-endingprogram of appointments. We are too busy to be good wives (0rhusbands) to our husbands (or wives), good homemakers, goodcompanions of our children, good friends to our friends, and with notime at all to be friends to the friendless. But if we withdraw frompublic engagements and interests, in order to spend quiet hours withthe family, guilty calls of citizenship whisper disquieting claims inour ears. Our children's schools should receive our attention, thewider issues of the nation and of the world are heavy upon us. Ourprofessional status, our social obligations, . . . .put claims uponus. And in frantic fidelity we try to meet at least the necessaryminimum of calls upon us. But we're weary and breathless. And we knowand regret that our life is slipping away. . . . The times for thedeeps of the silence of the heart seem so few . . . . Our complexliving, we say, is due to the complex world we live in....(but) Iwould suggest that the true explanation of the complexity of ourprogram is an inner one, not an outer one. The outer distractions ofour interests reflect an inner lack of integration of our own lives.We are trying to be several selves at once.
Thesolution according to Kelly is an integration of the self into a lifecentered in the holy. That is (in my words) a complete and willingsurrendering to the love of God. When one's center is God's love hesays (these are my words) there is a constant re-evaluation of whatis really important and what is not so important and it is alwayschanging as the circumstances of our lives change. When we love Godwith all of our heart as the great and simplest command asks us todo, we will know what it is that we are to do and need not do.Indeed everything becomes more clear in the light of the presence ofthis holiness of love that is awakened within us and shines on allthat surrounds us. Surrendered to God's love also means trusting Godto hold the world so that we can let go at least of the idea that ifwe do not do everything the world will simply collapse around us. Atthe same time God's love within us compels us to do what furthersGod's purposes on earth for everyone. Within the clarity of aGod-centered life however we will know better what it is that we cando now and what we will have to leave to others to do. God will notask us to do what we cannot do and God will not ask us to cause harmto others or ourselves. God simply asks us to love others as Godloves us. It doesn't mean that we do everything but it does mean thatwhatever we do, we do with love. This of course doesn't mean much ifyou still haven't surrendered to the reality that God loves you.Basic, simple, but hard to really believe. (Here's a tip. You don'thave to wait for the assurance that God loves you in order to goright ahead and love God. You don't have to believe anything to loveGod only that you want to love God beause if you really want to loveGod you will. If you seek you will find. And if you continue to loveGod you will even one day know what love is.)
Kellyreminds us that religion isn't just one more thing to be added to ourlist of duties and thus increase the complexity of our lives. Thelife with God is the center of life, and all else is remodeled andintegrated by it. In other words we do not adapt religion to ourusual way of creating just more busyness to keep us employed. Weadapt the rest of our lives within the context of the holy presencethat asks us simply to love God with all our hearts in everything wedo.
The placeof rest is within us all along. It doesn't matter if you go to thelake or to the mountains or to the sanctuary, if you take along ascattered and anxious heart you will not find rest. What is it theBible says Our hearts are restless and shall remain restless untilwe rest in Thee, O God.
There isa beautiful word in the Jewish prayer book that takes the definitionof this rest down to its particulars. It is the afternoon prayer forthe Sabbath day. It says, in part, May the children realize andunderstand that their rest comes from Thee, and that to rest means tosanctify Thy name. ....a rest in love and generosity, a true andgenuine rest, a rest that yields peace and serenity, tranquility andsecurity, a perfect rest with which Thou art pleased.
Love,generosity, peace, serenity, tranquility, security - all of these arethe experiences of a true and genuine rest none of which will befound by simply changing what we do everyday. These are very big anddeep words that become real when we reside in God's light, when wesurrender to love, accept our limitations and our responsibilitiesand trust God to help us know which is which and trust God to holdthe world and to have the last word.
It is sosimple really. Yet we still have to do it and surrendering to faithis not as easy as it is simple. Neither does it mean that we are nolonger responsible. It simply means that we be more able to respondto a life that seems to overwhelm us and carry us along helpless tostop it or even slow it down enough to find some rest once and awhile. It is not enough simply to seek God like everything else as ifGod were something to be had by whoever does the right things anddoes the most things. It is not God we seek to have but God we seekto love for it is love of God that opens the world up in holiness andreveals to us what life means and what is important. It is not abouthaving God but abut God having us. Dillard did say we live in all weseek. I agree. If we seek to love God we will live in God's love. Andin God's love, we will discover the beauty and peace and serenity andsecurity of God's world that is at least as real as the world that isugly and warlike and insecure not so that we can find momentaryescape but so that we can bring constant and steadfast healing to atroubled world and to our anxious hearts not necessarily by doingmore but by understanding more why we do anything at all. Does thetrouble go away when we love God? No, but it's size changes. When weface the troubles of the world on our own they seem impossibly large,but secure in God's love it is revealed that whatever the trouble is,God's love is greater.
Andsometimes it is just a matter of recognizing that we and all that weworry about is already surrounded by beauty and peace if only wewould open our eyes and hearts to see it.
After anadventure in which Eeyore fell into the river got wet and much dramaensued, Pooh and Christopher Robin sat quietly together. For along time they looked at the river beneath them, saying nothing, andthe river said nothing too, for it felt very quiet and peaceful onthis summer afternoon. A glimpse of the holy presence issometimes very simple indeed. Sometimes silence itself is a blessedand surprising gift. As a little girl in N. Dakota said: Silencereminds me to take my soul me wherever I go.
I admit Iwas terrified when I thought of teaching 12 five-year-olds for fivedays. But when I surrendered to them, recognizing God in them, andthey blessed me with themselves and with the beauty and love that isunique to the little ones, I discovered that God is presenteverywhere (especially in the children) and rest is availableeverywhere, too, because it is in God's love and in loving God thatwe find true rest and that is something we can do whenever we wantto, whenever we decide to surrender.
Come,come, whoever you are,
Wanderer,worshipper, lover of leaving - it
doesn'tmatter.
Ours isnot a caravan of despair.
Come, evenif you have broken your vows a
hundredtimes.
Come, comeagain, come. (Rumi)
(Come andrest a while.) (Jesus)
